There is a LOT of ground to cover here, which we could fight with conventional weapons, but that could take years, and cost millions of lives, so we will now shift to a format that was stolen, err…BORROWED from the Burkster himself, which was used in what could be referred to as the “pilot episode” of THE NITRO JOINT, and so, let’s unleash some random chunks of rock and racing, shall we?

I learned of the concept of 'subliminal advertising' from an episode of COLUMBO, and with that in mind -- a show-of-hands -- how many people hear Booker T & the MGs classic "Green Onions" and immediately get a mental picture of the big showdown between Milner and Falfa out on Paradise Road from American Graffiti?

Or, when you hear 'Turn Turn Turn' by The Byrds, and you're thinking of the scene in Heart Like a Wheel, where the stage is being set that Connie and Shirley are going to become a couple? [Sidebar: just recently learned that another actor had been cast as Connie but was dumped early in the shoot. I liked "Jeff’s little brother’s" spin as The Bounty Hunter. To this day, when I lose an argument with management, I'll lash out that they "wanna turn us into GOLF!"]

Can I CONFIRM that ratings for ‘The Munsters’ improved once they began showing their George Barris hot rods and switched the opening music to a Dick Dale-esque guitar riff extravaganza? No, but that’s when all the kids at school first began TALKING about the show, that I can confirm!

Speaking of Dick Dale, don’t you just love that his stylings are quite often the “go-to sound” whenever film makers are doing something with cars? And that commercial Mister Dale was in a while back, that was GREAT! Granted, it wasn’t selling racing or a race car, but it was selling. (And what’s with commercials always trying to get you to BUY something, I mean, what’s up with THAT?) You saw it, the kids are all heading to the beach to surf, announcer beats the drum that this awesome ride will save you money, and does the set-up, “and what will YOU do with all the money you’ve saved?? Cut to Dick Dale on the beach, riffing away, THAT is even better than Jeff Spicoli hiring Van Halen to play his birthday party!

Chicago Jon (left) with concert promoter Ron Onesti at White Snake.

At some point in time, you know you’ve requested a particular sandwich, consisting of ground beef between puffy bread-adjacent articles, topped with a dairy product usually associated with Wisconsin, but you KNOW you yelled it

out Steve Miller-style, from his signature song ‘Livin In The USA’. “Somebody gimme a CHEESEBURGER!”

Speaking of Steve Miller, here’s one I’ve been ‘beating against a dead horse’ for a couple decades. Alice Cooper admitted to writing a song in the hopes it would be used in an upcoming movie (song was ‘Man With The Golden Gun’

he hoped it would be the title for the next Bond movie; no, it wasn’t). On Steve’s 1981 album CIRCLE OF LOVE he had a song called ‘Heart Like a Wheel’. The Shirley Muldowney biopic would have been in pre-production by then, so was young Mister Miller hoping to be on the soundtrack? Said song even has a riff that, much like “Bad Motor Scooter” and “Kick Start My Heart”, invokes the sound/feel of a car going through the gears…boy, these tin-foil-hats sure are itchy, right?

This one has been a head-scratcher for some time. The Led Zeppelin movie, ‘The Song Remains the Same’ has a sequence where John Bohnam “drives Clive Skilton’s dragster”. Admittedly, Bonzo was a gearhead, but does one REALLY just plop down behind the butterfly and pull this off? With a perfect fire burnout to boot! I once saw ABC’s Wide World Of Sports open with Bill Fleming welcoming everyone to Islip Speedway from behind the wheel of a car, which “he” then does a perfect rollover in, and climbs out to the cheering crowd. They then, as they went to the break, showed their sense of humor as in fast-forward, with comic music to boot, showed that Bill did his drop-in, got out, let the stuntman do his job, then re-entered the car for the wave to the crowd. Bonzo’s not taking many calls, for about 35 years now, (a gallon of screwdrivers will do that for ya) so “Clive Skilton, white courtesy phone, please….”

So, it’s Rock & Roll! It’s RACING! It’s Rock & Roll & Racing!! Just like Carbon…Fiber! Uma…OPRAH! Sorry gang, it’s been a brutal month; more on that at a later date. Thanks for hanging out, next month I’ll be regaling you with the shocking and true story of The Burkster himself and I taking Route 66 Raceway by storm, with "Swords and Tequila" (RIOT, 1981) in one hand, and torches, chainsaws and cameras in the other! I know that’s a lotta stuff to hold, but much like Trump, we have “big hands”!

Crank it up to ELEVEN … in the meantime, C-YAAAA!!